...gonna kick the darkness 'till it bleeds daylight... musings of a hungarian in texas

©2003 by Annamaria Kovacs. All contents of this blog are the property of the author. Use with written permission only.

Friday, October 05, 2007

Words of the Week

John 5: 2-6

2 Now there is at Jerusalem by the sheep market a pool, which is called in
the Hebrew tongue Bethesda, having five porches.
3 In these lay a great multitude of impotent folk, of blind,
halt, withered, waiting for the moving of the water.
4 For an angel went down at a certain season into the pool, and
troubled the water: whosoever then first after the troubling of the water
stepped in was made whole of whatsoever disease he had.
5 And a certain man was there, which had an infirmity thirty and
eight years.
6 When Jesus saw him lie, and knew that he had been now a long
time in that case, he saith unto him, Wilt thou be made whole?

Which parts of our lives are really touched by faith?

Our minds? Surely. However, it was said a long time ago by much smarter people than I that one can never reach God’s realm by standing on the ladders of reason alone. You cannot reason God. You cannot comprehend God. If anyone could do that, there either would be no need for faith, or there would be a new god. It is kinda like a loving relationship between two people: it’s built on trust and not on sure and complete knowledge. If it is built on knowledge and reason, that is not love, that is a work relationship. Likewise, faith does not come from reason—but the already existing faith can look for God with reasoning.

The other important part of our humanity, besides having a reasoning mind, is that we have feelings. We are capable of love; we feel moved by others actions, non-actions, events in the world, events in our lives, causes presented to us. We know from Jesus’ parable about the seeds that a great number of the seeds of the Word did not bring fruit because human feelings alone did not nurture them. Our feelings do not always lead us to the right direction. They are like a great big fluffy blanket, which will never hold us up, but its warmth will sustain us through the cold days.

Where faith really touches us is our will. “Do you wish to be made whole?” asks Jesus even today. We need to decide if we want to stay faithful. We need to give Him our will, and everything else will follow.It is difficult to talk about will these days—all around us the message is glaring at us, is beamed at us, suggesting that we can pretty much do whatever we want, we can have whatever we want. One morning spent listening to ads on the radio alone can convince us about this. However, if we want God to clear our will first—we have made the first step towards becoming a real person in the Christian sense.

Do I wish to be made whole? “It is so nice at church.” you hear sometimes. “It makes me feel good.” We have so many troubles and problems daily—do we want to put these down and set out on the Good Road, directed by our will that was purified by God? Or we just go to church on Sunday, feel really good afterwards, it makes us think a little bit, but we do not follow up on the words we heard at all.

Jesus does not break in to our house. He does not ‘want’ instead of us. He is, contrary to our modern world’s ready-to-consume thoughts and products, waiting for our action. But he is also ready for anyone who wishes, who wants to, go to him. If we offer our prayers to him every morning, if we will ourselves to heal, if we will to chew God’s living Bread just as well as our breakfast, so to speak, we will be able to heal. If we will to restrain ourselves, if we do not will excess neither in the world, nor to become overly ‘churchy’—we will be able to heal.


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